Thursday, September 2, 2010

Charles Darwin writes a letter to Stephen Hawking

World renowned physicist Stephen Hawking has just published a new book titled The Grand Design. According to Hawking, the aim of the book is to answer questions like, why are the laws of nature what they are, why do we exist and did the universe need a designer and creator? The Grand Design, which is scheduled to be released on September 7th, is drawing harsh criticism from the religious community because its conclusions specifically state that there is no need to invoke God as an explanation for existence.

Charles Darwin writes a letter to Stephen Hawking

Dr. Stephen Hawking,

I am sending this correspondence out of admiration of your recently published book, The Grand Design. Although I am not a physicist by trade, in my assessment I found the text of your explanations to be written with a clarity, thoroughness and prose rarely encountered in popular works of the sciences; undeniably the book was both informative and inspiring. However, dear sir, at the risk of confusing my professional appraisal of your theories with my own personal motivations, I must be completely honest as to the true reason for holding your publication in such regards, and indeed the real purpose behind this current letter.

Since publication of my abominable theory of natural selection in the Origin of Species, I have been bombarded with continuous assault, and insult, from the pious in our shared world community. My publications have been banned, burned, intentionally misconstrued and even cited as the works of the devil. Despite having paid little time or mind to harebrained allegations of being a pointy-tailed marauder, I must confess that I have found religion’s interference with science, and the pursuit of knowledge in general, to be the most disheartening of experiences. In short, dear sir, thank you for deflecting the gaze of the religious eye from me and my field of interest - the biological sciences.

Not since publication of the Origin of Species in 1859 have I been so at ease; and remember dear sir, I have been dead since April of 1882! Now finally, after all of this time, religious zealots of every ilk, sect and creed can take a break from their incessant efforts to ban the teaching of evolution. Now, thanks to you sir, these fools can focus on other issues they deem to be of importance - unfortunately the issues they deem important will likely include banning instruction in chemistry, physics and astronomy…

With the most sincere of gratitude,

Charles Darwin

PS: If I may be so bold as to offer a parting word of advice, you may wish to inquire into the availability of fire retardant book covers for your publication.

No comments:

Post a Comment